Like I Would ~ Megan and Liz

She is a pageant queen
With over 20 titles to her name
But here’s the funny thing
She’s not a day older than 18
See I have bigger dreams
Than living in this town
I’m not a beauty queen
I would stay but I don’t wanna drown

But then there’s you
You won’t dream that big
And that’s why

She’s the kind of girl you marry
And I’m the kind you don’t
She’s the one you wanna carry into your brand new home
After your honeymoon right
She looked better in white
Than I ever could, But
She won’t love you like I would

He is the basketball star
The captain of the team
And it’s so sad to think
That it’s the only place he’ll take his dream
In 20 years from now
When he’s married to his beauty queen
He’ll look down at his baby
Is this as perfect as it seems

But then there’s you
You wouldn’t dream that big
And that’s why

She’s the kind of girl you marry
And I’m the kind you don’t
She’s the one you wanna carry into your brand new home
After your honeymoon right
She looked better in white
Than I ever could, But
She won’t love you like I would

Maybe I regret
Not loving you
And maybe it’s the hardest thing
I’ve ever had to do
She’s the kind of girl you marry
And I’m the kind you don’t
But I’m just not right for you

She’s the kind of girl you marry
And I’m the kind you don’t
She’s the one you wanna carry into your brand new home
After your honeymoon right
She looked better in white
Than I ever could, But
She won’t love you like I would

Being A Good Secret Fan

It’s been 60 hours since I saw you.

You’re white jacket is so predictable.

With red backpack on your shoulder and a cell phone in your hand.

58 hours since I walked in through the door.

I couldn’t move.

I couldn’t breathe.

I just sat there ‘till my neck’s killing me.

It was 56 hours ago when we came face to face for a good few seconds.

And I’m still flying.

Call me crazy, I wouldn’t care.

You know you’ve got a nice smile.

And it’s been a while since the last time I hear your voice.

It doesn’t matter if you don’t care.

Because I believe I’m just being a good secret fan.

A Sucker For..

Bought a new lip balm few days ago. Why I chose this one? Mainly because it's purple. Period.

I'm a sucker for purple things and lately, makeups. 

Actually, also stilettos and platform-heels. But THANKFULLY, I usually fell in love with stuff that aren't available in Indonesia and won't ship to Indonesia either. Thank you. It saves a lot of my money. That's probably why I usually don't enter a store except a restaurant in mall or any shopping place. I just passed through it. It's dangerous for me to go to the mall. Guilty pleasure! *hands up*

Baby Lips Energizing Orange by Maybelline New York. Mostly orange, but there is a tint of purple ;;)

My new purple makeup brush kit. Ha! 

First Midterm

I just finished my first midterm test ever as a college student last week. It was opened by English 1 and closed by Physic 1. It was probably the most random weeks that I ever felt. I personally didn't feel like I was doing a midterm test. My body was already in college, but my mind and my heart was still on a long vacation, I think -,-“

English 1 test was a story, an essay, and multiple choices. I’m pretty sure that I answered it correctly in story and essay. Every. Single. Thing. A little bit bragging here.., Aira. But…… I’m not so sure on multiple choices. It was confusing, I guess? Or I was just too stupid to notice the easiest thing? I don’t know. Let’s just wait and see.

Math 1 was perfectly fine, I think. It was an essay which I thought was better than multiple choices. I know I wouldn't get a perfect score because I made minor mistakes here and there. But I’m pretty sure that’s enough to get an A. Hopefully.

Bahasa Indonesia.. I NEED 5 MORE MINUTES SO I CAN FINISHED MY LAST THREE SENTENCES :( But overall, it was good. I’m optimist. But my senior told me that the lecturer would give us random score, not based on our test, assignment, or absensi(?). That made me not so optimist anymore -,-“ As long I could passed, I’m good, Sir. Really. But an A is better, thank you.

Basic Geology required us to answer every single question with meaning, explanation, example, and picture (well, in this case, our own “drawing”). I’m not an artist, so my drawing was horrible. But hey, at least I did everything he wanted. Choose a question that I know the answer, what was the meaning, explained it, gave an example, and drew a (horrible) picture. There were six questions. We just need to answer four out of six. Thank god, because I had no idea the answers to the other two questions. It went well.

Agama was an essay based on opinion thingy, I guess? I’m sucks at giving opinion, but pretty damn good in “writing”, so…..HAHAHAHAHA I don’t think I need to comment on that. You get the picture. Yeah, I’m just awesome like that.

Introduction of Earth Technology and Energy. I need to answer fifty multiple choices. I had no idea what I did. And so were everybody. I’m not alone, thankfully. It was really hard. I’m not gonna lie about that.

Chemistry? I didn’t feel it.

Praktikum GeoDin went horrible. I didn’t feel like I was on the lab that day. My mind was somewhere…. over the rainbow~ But hey, look at the bright side, the lab assistant who tested me smiled a lot. He made me forget that I’m failed. For a moment. A very handsome young man. But taken. Every handsome young man is either taken or gay. That’s kinda not fair, don’t you think?

Physic 1 was last. I was blank. That’s it. Definitely need to try harder for the next test. I hate it when I suddenly got blank, at the wrong time. My mistakes, I guess..

Did I study hard like some people in class? No. So I think, I deserved any score that the lecturer gave me. I didn't even try. I don't have any right to put a high standard. I understand perfectly why.

College life is hard. There are too many fake people around me. Just like high school all over again. But hey, at least I’m stronger now. I’m already used to it. I’m not shocked anymore. It’s cool. I’m used to be on my own. I’m used to pretending that everything is fine. I’m used to people lie in front of my face, even though I already know the truth. I just hope that I can survive this. And winning my own battle *shrug*

I'm trying not to be a jerk. Trying not to cry and curse on the outside.

and I thought, hey, I'm a great actress. I should win an Oscar -____-"

Enchanted ~ Taylor Swift

There I was again tonight, forcing laughter, faking smilesSame old tired, lonely placeWalls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancyVanished when I saw your face
All I can say is it was enchanting to meet you
Your eyes whispered, "Have we met?" across the room, your silhouetteStarts to make its way to meThe playful conversation starts, counter all your quick remarksLike passing notes in secrecy
And it was enchanting to meet youAll I can say is I was enchanted to meet you
This night is sparkling, don't you let it goI'm wonder-struck, blushing all the way homeI'll spend forever wondering if you knewI was enchanted to meet you
The lingering question kept me up, 2 a.m., who do you love?I wonder 'til I'm wide awakeNow I'm pacing back and forth, wishing you were at my doorI'd open up and you would say
It was enchanting to meet youAll I know is I was enchanted to meet you
This night is sparkling, don't you let it goI'm wonder-struck, blushing all the way homeI'll spend forever wondering if you knew
This night is flawless, don't you let it goI'm wonder-struck, dancing around all aloneI'll spend forever wondering if you knewI was enchanted to meet you
This is me praying that
This was the very first page, not where the storyline endsMy thoughts will echo your name until I see you againThese are the words I held back as I was leaving too soonI was enchanted to meet you
Please don't be in love with someone elsePlease don't have somebody waiting on youPlease don't be in love with someone elsePlease don't have somebody waiting on you
This night is sparkling, don't you let it goI'm wonder-struck, blushing all the way homeI'll spend forever wondering if you knew
This night is flawless, don't you let it goI'm wonder-struck, dancing around all aloneI'll spend forever wondering if you knewI was enchanted to meet you
Please don't be in love with someone elsePlease don't have somebody waiting on you

Smile

I smiled a lot today. Not sure why. Thankfully, I'm all alone in my room. If I act like this in front of a lot of people, they might thought that I'm crazy. Like, really.

New Stamp

Just bought this one, it's cute.. guilty pleasure. Ha!

Omaigat! I need to stop going to the mall every weekend! And stop buying things that aren't important! but..... .-.
I need to save more money -_____-"

I Know I Shouldn't

I haven’t changed

I don’t want to give up either

I don’t want to let the world laugh at me forever

I don’t wish, I know

I don’t want to seem weak

I don’t want to cry, not in front of you

I don’t want to complain, but I did it anyway

I know I shouldn’t

Untitled

The moment I tried to like you, the moment when you betrayed me. After all I've done? Thanks a lot a subject that I have to learn in college. I know you’re important, but you’re annoying as hell.

Next time, I expected you to be nicer to me.

Well, actually it wasn't its fault, though. It’s a person who opened a printing service to not open on Sunday. And me to not have a printer. But still! Why this subject? Why today? -____-“

Wedding Bells ~ THE Jonas Brothers

I’m currently obsessed with this new Jonas brothers song. It’s not because I’m a fan of niley or whatsoever. It’s just.. I miss the Jonas Brothers together, on stage, singing their songs. I couldn't come to Radio City music halls in New York City last October 11^th because I lived in another side of the planet. I couldn't watch the streaming on VyRT either because I was still on campus T.T So to whoever were there and recorded the show and upload it on youtube, THANK YOU. YOU MADE MY DAY ;;)

The Jonas Brothers will perform in Singapore, Malaysia, and Philippines this October. And not Indonesia. Because “the promotor”said that The Jonas is too expensive and bla.. bla.. bla.. I couldn't go to one of the countries mentioned above either. Because of THE FREAKING MIDTERM *cries*So here I go…. Waiting for everyone who will be there and recorded the whole show and  then upload it on youtube…

There were another two new songs they performed on the show. They  called “First Time” and “Let’s Go”. But I couldn't understand the lyrics. I’m still waiting for the better quality videos. Anyone have it? ;;) But it sounds cool :D

 I COULDN'T WAIT FOR THEIR NEW ALBUM TO COME OUT. THEY NEED TO RELEASE A NEW SINGLE, LIKE, NOW.

I hope I could go to one of their concert at least once. Probably not this year. But the word “soon” is sound good enough right now.

Pardon my interruption

This drink’s just settling in

On my reservations

A reason I don’t exist

She says, can you keep a secret

A ceremony set for June

I know it’s a rush but I just love him so much

I hope that you can meet him soon

No, I don’t wanna love if it’s not you

I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells bloom

Maybe we can try one last time

But I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells chime

Trying to fall asleep

You wake me up cause I’m trying to see the light instead of you in white

I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells chime

Wedding bells, wedding bells, wedding bells

Pardon my harsh reaction

You put me on the spot

And if I’m being honest,

I’m hoping that I’d get caught

Showing you I’m all happy

Not letting you see my truth

Cause if you recall our anniversary falls 11 nights into June

No, I don’t wanna love if it’s not you

I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells bloom

Maybe we can try one last time

But I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells chime

Fall asleep and wake me up and I’m trying to see the lights instead of you in white

I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells chime

The wedding bells, wedding bells

No, I don’t wanna love if it’s not you

I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells bloom

Maybe we can try one last time

But I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells chime

Fall asleep and wake me up and I’m trying to see the lights instead of you in white

I don’t wanna hear the wedding bells chime

The wedding bells..

Sometimes, Somethings are Better Left Unspoken

Sometimes, somethings are better left unspoken.

Why?
People might not care about it.
People might laugh at it.
Somebody's might get hurt.
It's not that important.
You just don't want to make a scene.
Or you want to make a scene. Haha

But seriously, sometimes it's better when we keep it to our self. Trust. Me.

Cry

Cry..
When you feel like you needed to
Doesn't matter if it's tears of joy,
Or sadness and sorrow
It'll help you released the pain,
Or even express happiness (?)


I read someone's blog, then I suddenly shed a tear. Not sure why. It's not about me. Nor my life either. I just...

Sometimes tears came out without reasons. Because its tired to holding on too long. Maybe?

Happiness is Simple

Happiness is simple

As simple as the rain falls when you needed to cry

As simple as the sun shine when summer came

As simple as the ribbon that colored the blue sky

As simple as the moon when the dark arrived

As simple as the bird that singing their song

As simple as the warmth of the wind that passed by

As simple as the sound of dancing water

As simple as the smell of morning dew

As simple as your smile to you, and you, and you

A Simple Smile, A Victory

When you thought you would be fine

When you thought it was alright

When you thought it would change for better

That's when you have to know that you are wrong

They'll look. They'll laugh. There's no turning back

Only you that you all have

Face it fearlessly, make it shine

The stage has been waiting forever

The spotlights are set

Put your best smile even if it's fake

They'll bow, they'll sorry

They won't know, they won't ask

They'll just believe what was shown

All you need just a simple smile, a victory





*okay, this, didn't even make a sense -,-"

What if You're Not Supposed to be Here?

What if you're not supposed to be here?

What would you do?

Would you run away and left all behind?

or stayed where you are and let it flow?

Where will you go if you choose to run?

Will you ever stop in place where you thought you should?

or forever in a run?

Will you survive if you choose to stay?

Will you stand still and be a winner?

or get slaughtered along the road?

How did you know what was the best for yourself?

Is it by finally feeling alive?

How do you know you will finally felt relieved? 

Is it by living a life full of lie?

How do you know you will win?

Wish You The Worst ~ Katy Perry

I saw you at the grocery store
Oh, you both look happy
Picking out the usual

She's carbon copy
Of everything you lost
Of everything I'm not
I guess you forgot 
how to pick 'em

If she's the one I've heard about
I'm disappointed
If she's the reason why you left
I'm not impressed at all

Well, this looks like the end
Yeah, we can still be friends
Congratulations

Let me be the first
To wish you the worst
'Cause I think you 
deserve each other

Let me be the curse that creeps
Under your skin
Until your heart caves in
And you wish
She was me again

And again
And again
And again

Well, someone had to tell the truth
And I'm always honest
I read you like an open book

And it's obvious to me
She's just the one between
Heading no where fast
Sure, it's gonna last forever


Let me be the first
To wish you the worst
'Cause I think you 
deserve each other

Let me be the curse that creeps
Under your skin
Until your heart caves in
And you wish
She was me again


Let me be the first
To wish you the worst
'Cause I think you 
deserve each other

Let me be the curse that creeps
Under your skin
Until your heart caves in
And you wish
She was me again

And again
And again
And again

Oh, you wish
You wish
You wish
You do

New Flashdisk

I used to have a purple flashdisk and the yellow one. But A PERSON said that she was to busy go give it back to me after she borrowed it few months ago. WHAT THE?
And the yellow one is broken T.T
I desperately need a flashdisk for everything right now, so I HAVE to buy a new one. It's not purple anymore. Gak ada ditokonya T.T But I thought it's cute, isn't it? ;;)

Seniors

There are few types of seniors that I have met on campus. The one that always smile and act really nice whenever we said hi even though they were busy. Talking, doing their work, or even gossiping. It was really nice of them to even smile to us. Then, the one that answer our “hi” with “yo” without expression. Probably there are too much things that going on in their mind at the moment. Or…………… too tired? You know, college life will not always easy and simple as we have seen on TV.  There are also some seniors who looked confused when we said “hi” and then smiled when we left. The reaction was too late. It was like they didn’t know what’s going on. Did something hit your head this morning, buddy? And there are people who won’t even looked at us. Why? I don’t know. Probably because they are seniors. *shrug*Oh and by the way, greeting seniors and saying hi to them with a big smile is a must for freshmen.

There is senior that every girl, but me, adore. He’s dreamy. He’s charming. He has that charisma. He has the smile that will make you forget that you’re still on earth. He has nice pair of eyes that will make you lost in them. He’s the one of the first type seniors that has been mentioned above. He’s a part of religious organization. He’s also a second leader in our faculty. First is the executive leader. Second, him. Not sure what was his spot in English. Haha. Third, department leaders. In this faculty, there are three department leaders. One for petroleum, one for geology, and one for mining. Mostly, my friends fall for his charisma. And smile. Some girls were squealing whenever he walked by. Others were sighed dreamily. Some girls said they were just a fan. These girls acted normal. Way way normal than the other two. But still…. girls. :P I just not interested in him. At all. Not sure why. Am I still normal? Yes? Good.

To tell you the truth, senior boys are way nicer than the girls. The girls were looked like they had PMS every single day for the past month.

Going Downhill

I just realized that my writing, listening, and reading in English have been going downhill. Hiks. Probably because I have no TV for the past five months. There are no AXN, StarWorld, and everything in between. Haven't heard people talked in English. Haven't read English novels anymore. Haven't talked in English. Well, I haven't done the last one since forever. Last time I talked in English was in junior high school, I guess? *sigh*
I hope I could get better in English. Again. 
English is really important these days... *sigh*

Feels good to write again~

Feels good to write again!! Welcome back to me~ I haven't been on for a while. Getting bored with laptop and the internet. HA! Like that would happen. The internet connection is more frustrating than the college itself. Actually, college life is not frustrating at all. Probably because I just started it for like... a month?

Too... Blue

It’s been a month since I finally became a college student. Well, it’s not official, yet. But.. yeah. I finally started to live by myself. Alone in our lovely capital city of Indonesia, Jakarta. I could stay with my grandparents if wanted to. BUT IF I choose to stay at my grandmother’s house, it would be me sending myself to death. No. It’s not because I don’t love them or anything. But the traffic is killing me. Slowly. So my parents, no scratch that, my grandma chose a great location to stay. She said that. She rented a room across the campus. Free from traffic. At lease from that place to campus, only.  It took around 5 minutes, walking. She said it was the best place. She said she knew it was. Well, I complained at first to my parents, but what can I do? Nothing. I should stay there. Whether I like it or not. I didn’t get a place to even say word.

The room is…nice, I guess. It’s small but enough to keep a lot of my stuffs. By a lot, I mean A LOT. Like, really. You can’t even imagine how many things that I kept with me. Some things are important. Others, not so much. No air conditioner. No private bathroom. But it’s okay. It’s just………………too blue. The wall, the bed, the curtain, everything. And we’re not allowed to change a thing. *sigh*I want my purple room back T.T just like the old times…………..in Duri :( I miss it. Really really bad. I prefer white than blue. It’s way way way better. Why can’t I choose my own place to stay?

Am I a cry baby? Yes. And I don't care. 

Halfway There ~ Big Time Rush

[James:]
If we never flew
We would never fall
If the world was ours
We would have it all
But the life we live
Isn't so simplistic
You just don't get what you want

[Logan:]
So we take what comes
And we keep on going
Leaning on each other's shoulders
Then we turn around
And see we've come so far somehow

We're halfway there
We're looking good now
Nothing's gonna get in the way
We're halfway there
And looking back now
I never thought that I'd ever say
We're halfway there
We're halfway there

[Kendall:]
When the chips are down
Back against the wall
Got no more to give
Cause we gave it all
Seems like going the distance
Is unrealistic
But we're too far from the start

[Carlos:]
So we take what comes
And we keep on going
Leaning on each other's shoulders
Then we turn around
And see we've come so far somehow

We're halfway there
We're looking good now
Nothing's gonna get in the way
We're halfway there
And looking back now
I never thought that I'd ever say
We're halfway there
We're halfway there

[Logan:]
How you ever gonna reach the stars
If you never get off the ground?
And you'll always be where you are
If you never life knocked you down

We're halfway there
We're looking good now
Nothing's gonna get in the way
We're halfway there
And looking back now
I never thought that I'd ever say
We're halfway there

We're halfway there
We're halfway there
We're halfway there

We're halfway there
We're halfway there
We're halfway there

We're halfway there
We're halfway there




This song is definitely for me ;)
I'm already halfway there. Why would I stop?

Haircut

Just got my hair cut few days ago. BIG MISTAKE. I already miss my long hair :'(. But heeeey, look at the bright side.............................. what's the bright side? Can't find it.

It'll grow back. it'll grow back. *trying to reassure myself*

Intensive Class

I started an intensive class for SNMPTN tertulis today. SNMPTN tertulis is a test for 12th grade students who wanted to go to public university. Thousands people applied every year. But only small portion of them that actually get accepted. Some of them were really smart. Some of them were studying harder than other people. And some of them were just... lucky.


There are several institution that wanted to help us to study. Especially for people like me. Depends on my mood. And that's not a good thing.


At first, the teachers look scary. And yes, they were. But hey! There were no easy way to live our dreams, aren't they?
But yes, it's really hard. Who said it's not?


Basic Math.
Bahasa Indonesia.
English.
Hard Science Math.
Physics.
Chemistry.
Biology.
and TPA (I don't what's TPA in English -___-)


Keep FIGHTING GIRL!!!








oh, and I think my English is really bad in this post ._.

Forward. Together. 2012.

Okaaay.. I was freaking out today. Why? Because my boys changed their profile picture!! Crazy? YES I KNOW. But I don't mind ;p


The Jonas Brothers were taking a break for a few moments. I really miss seeing them together even though I never saw them LIVE. 


Nick's focusing on his Nick and the Administration album, and Broadway performances.
Joe has solo album.
And Kevin... well, he has Danielle now. ;)


But todaaaay, they changed profile picture, post newest photo, writing and recording songs TOGETHER, and announced Kevin and Dani reality show called Married to Jonas (premiering next August everybody!! Don't forget!! But I don't have E!channel. Huh. Not good. Not good).


More Jonas together? YES PLEASE! 
And hopefully, they'll come to Indonesia on their next tour *pray*

Love Slayer ~ Joe Jonas

and this :)

I came to do my dance
I'm 'bout to touch the town
I came to lift my hands
I came to shut this thing down

I came to do my dance
I'm 'bout to touch the town
I came to lift my hands
I came to shut this thing down, down, down

Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I want more of it
Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I think I love it

She's a killer! Straight up, no feelings, 
If you ain’t heard about her, she’s a stone cold dream stealer, 
Love slayer, most likely I’ll be on my worst behavior, oh ooh
She’ll love you up all night but I’m ready to stay up
I just came to!

I came to do my dance
I'm 'bout to touch the town
I came to lift my hands
I’m ’bout to shut this thing down

Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I want more of it
Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I think I love it

Head banger
Better beware of danger, ahhh
I hope you like livin' on the wild side, cause she’s no stranger
Love slayer, most likely I’ll be on my worst behavior, oh ooh
She’ll love you up all night but I’m ready to stay up
I just came to!

I came to do my dance
I'm 'bout to touch the town
I came to lift my hands
I’m ‘bout to shut this thing down

Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I want more of it
Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I think I love it

And all of my friends, they tried to warn me
They told me she would haunt me
But I gotta be, yeah, I gotta be,
I gotta be the life of the party
Told my friends that she won’t hurt me,
I'm in control, don’t worry
She’s known to be, she’s known to be,
Yeah, She’s known to be a

Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
And I want more of it
Love slayer, causing nothing but trouble, babe
Love slayer, Love slayer, Love slayer

I came to do my dance
I'm 'bout to touch the town
I came to lift my hands
I came to shut this thing down